rant

i'm going to tell you what's going through my head right now, and pepper it with some instagram photos that i've taken in the last 10 months - 10 months in which i haven't blogged. i think that i've been sublimating my blogging instinct into instagramming, so follow me there @hello_ondrej if you're not doing so already!

love. i've been thinking about love. i note that we are a loving species. we don't just love a bit: we are bursting with it. how else could we fit so many millions of individuals into our cities without chaos erupting? we are giddy with love for each other. we all contribute. we pump out the viscous goo of love into our surroundings, and not only does it envelop us with its warmth, it forms the framework with which our societies and ethical paradigms are constructed.

♥ lucas ♥

who among us actually needs a book or a law to tell them not to kill or hurt other people? no-one. our laws and our religions are simply expressions of what we already know to be true from a lifetime of swimming in this thick, heady mix of human hearts and their excruciatingly delectable juices.

this love arises by doing nothing, by just being. the act of spending time with someone is the act of constructing love. it's irresistible. it's inevitable. it just happens. two hearts, side by side, will secrete their perfumes, marinating themselves and each other in the unique product of their combined chemistry, and we call the result of this love. let's recognise it. let's not be ashamed. let's shine like the big fat supernovas of juicy love that we all are. let's blind each other with it. let's have fun with it.

when we're silent - when we have the courage to shut the fuck up and stop creating misunderstanding with meaningless words - our hearts have time to listen, and hear whatever deeper message it is that the other hearts around us are trying to express. this message is amplified through touch, so get out there and touch people. touch the people you love, the people you know, the people you don't know. shake hands with someone and don't let go. put your hand on the shoulder of the person you're talking to. let your legs touch the people beside you on the train. hug people. we all want it more than anything. we're gagging for it. every single human being on this planet is crying out to be touched. i, too, am gagging and crying out, so next time you see me: put your arms around me for god's sake and don't let go. kiss me. hold my hand. squeeze my leg. do us both a favour and tell me to shut the fuck up. i never seem to stop talking, it's ridiculous. let's be silent and love each other.

and of course i must point out: what is sex but an intense, accelerated form of touch? our bodies cannot lie. through the movement of our eyes and lips and hands and limbs and trunks and cocks and cunts, we express truths that are instantly understood, and construct love that is instantly reciprocated. how could anything be more beautiful than that? so get out there and get loving boys and girls*. (*not with me)

sometimes when you are kissing someone, or you are holding someone's hand, or beholding a sunset, or listening to an amazing tune, you are - just for that moment - completely present. i know i've talked about this before, but it's always on my mind. this one moment: that is my god. this one moment is the meaning of life, and being present in this moment - the only thing we will ever have - is my life's deepest desire. it's a struggle. there's so much chatter in this big fat head. but there are so many delicious situations to practice being present in, and a whole lifetime in which to practice.

i'm not sure if i've ever expressed with any clarity my belief system, but i'm on a roll with my ranting, so i may as well just do it now.

my belief is that the universe is fundamentally neutral, that it is completely devoid of objective value. there is no right or wrong, good or bad, better or worse. there is nothing. our lives, our deaths, and anything that may happen between, have no meaning, and any significance we may attribute to anything at all is completely subjective and therefore irrelevant to almost anyone but ourselves. the universe is not cold and distant nor is it warm and friendly - it's just there (or appears to be). it doesn't owe us anything. what we do or don't do, whether we exist or don't exist and anything we may think or feel is inconsequential, value-neutral and nothing.

within this valueless meaninglessness, i exist. everything that i think or understand has been constructed from experiences gained through my fallible and often inaccurate senses, but this is all that i have ever been able to access, and all that i will ever access, and through this i have created a subjective understanding of the world around me. it's all i have, and because there can be no objective reality outside my subjective experience of the world, this little subjective reality suddenly becomes my entire universe - it is in fact the entire universe - and it becomes richly invested with the values that i have projected onto it.

this realisation motivates and liberates one to get out there and do whatever the fuck one wants. the fears that hold one back from having the time of one's life are revealed in the harsh light of logic to lack any significance, and the business of expanding one's subjective universe - the only reality that one will ever have - through all the different experiences that this life has to offer becomes absolutely prime.

this realisation also equalises us all, for in these subjective bubbles of reality that we live in, how could we presume to know what anyone else's experience is, or presume to place a value on anyone else's reality when our own is so objectively meaningless? we must have the same right to life, to be heard, to be loved. if anyone does, we all do. all humans. all beings.

the flip-side of recognising the objective meaninglessness of our lives is accepting that our subjective version of it couldn't be more meaningful - as nothing outside this could possibly exist. and as we have to assume that this is the same for every other individual alive - humans, and animals too if we follow the logic - suddenly we realise that everyone's lives are precious in a way that we could never understand, and it becomes impossible to judge anybody else (which values could you possibly use to judge them that don't apply only to yourself?)

perhaps this humbles us. perhaps this creates respect for others. perhaps we all realise this on an intrinsic level, and it's the fuel that our little hearts use to pump out their love.

mum ♥ watching the sunset on great keppel island

so that's where i'm at right now. i'm trying to be intensely present as i watch the glorious sunsets of central queensland and i stand atop the mountain shooting out green butterfly-shaped visualisations of my love to the world around me, and some of those butterflies are coming straight for you like heat-seeking missiles. this is my truth right now, and if it sounds like yet another rant of ondrej horse-shit, well i love you anyway you mother-fucker - you know i do - and i hope that you enjoyed the photos :)

peace!